it is what it is..

 

After the last 24 hours of detox and withdrawals I've no idea how to sum it all up into one post so bare with me because I'm sure I'm supposed to share with you this last weeks experience of detaching from some bad habits.

Can I first just say how yummy my bowl of oats are right now...my stomach is so happy.

{Knowing there's not just one way of detoxing your life/body/mind. I'm not soliciting advice through this post ..only sharing what's up with the way I'm feeling lead through it.}

You see I've had some addictions these past two years that maybe a few of you have caught on to but in being gracious haven't pointed these things out to me..thank you.  And just so you know I don't believe there's anything wrong with "cravings"  as long as they are short lived and 2 yrs isn't short.

So because I'm wanting to be free from "needing" these things, I started to pray for help and noticed these changes.

Meet the carvings/culprits:

Chi tea served latte or frappe style is delicious but don't be fooled..it's dangerous stuff.

I was introduced to it about  two years ago when a friend  wanted to meet at a local coffee shop to visit. She knew I didn't like coffee (don't fall over) so she suggested a tea..and that's when I choose chi tea because it had no caffeine and was a relaxant..heavenly.

What I failed to consider was the sugar content as well as the milk that would serve as the substance to which it was mixed in. And let's not forget to mention the cost of this little cup of heaven was between $3-$4. Ouch~ says my dh every time I'd indulge..and boy did I 5-6 x's a week or more.

Now before this love affair started I also had an affair with Dr.Pepper because no other could make my taste buds go nuts or taste so good with burgers and Mexican food.

Now that you know what it is, it doesn't seem so bad right? Wrong, they are small but all the same very powerful in this persons life.

Powerful enough to make one cut over two lanes of traffic to get to the entrance of said coffee shop and thus making her willing to be late for any appointments. 

Powerful enough to say to my dh "I'm gonna run  (20min) to town for a cup of tea", bless his heart he never questioned my addiction because it was after all my only "outlet".

Your starting to see just a small proportion of how this took over my life in a "large way" and sadly enough it was also another reason I packed on the 40lbs. So it's clear why I started to ask for intervention from God.

It wasn't until I did this that I noticed these things happen at my coffee shop:

New faces..not as nice as the old ones.

Never made it the same..to sweet or to watered down.

Switched brands and all was never the same.

I even tried to switch shops and the last time I ordered a grande I got a tall in a grande cup..uhh yeah that's not cool.

Then it happened..I started to feel let down every time and finally I could drive by without the urge to turn in..even if I drove by twice a day!

Then recently my dh and I started talking about juicing again so we went up to the storage room and dug around for our juicer. We couldn't find it..bummer.

He remembered his parents had one that they weren't using and maybe they would loan it or sell it to us as their's was practically brand new.

I was impatiently wanting to get started so I asked him to find out..he kept forgetting. Then while we were in the big city I practically begged him again like there was no tomorrow to buy a new one..nope.

I had such a sense of urgency about it I finally called myself and said "are you interested in selling us the juicer" and they said sure for a penny. His mom (Hi Nana) says we would rather see you use it then it sit on our shelf. What a nice blessing!

But the final straw so to speak wasn't until very recently that a dear friend of mine had some heart problems that sent her into the hospital for test. She's also my friend who introduced me to "the coffee" shop..it was as if it was a full circle and we were meeting again..this time both asking "what do we do now".

Before this time it would be "my grandmother's in the hospital..or my mother's in the hospital but now that I'm older it's my friend's in the hospital".

No it's not about me..but it is about the choices I make that determine the places I go and really do I want to make these choices?

This has hit me square between the eyes and is a constant companion these days.

Needless to say the juicers been  running every day for the past two weeks but I still I hadn't stopped drinking my friends "chi tea and Dr.P" cold turkey  and so you can guess the mixed signals my body had been receiving..ugh.

It was this past Monday that I told myself "you can't deny this is not healthy any longer..which do you want? What feels good temporarily or what last the longest.

I choose the juice and by far the benefits are great and it's something I can do without guilt as I share with the whole family  a more affordable habit. 

Still I have about six DP's in the pantry because there's nothing better with Mexican food and burgers..but I've not had a Chi tea since Monday this is small miracle and truly a process of "purification" that is helping me also to wake up in the morning and read His Word while showing me it's true things just don't happen overnight..I'll continue to report as I progress and take it from me..if you haven't started DON'T and if your having trouble "seeing it for what it really is" then ask Him to show you and be ready He will.

 

   Seek good, not evil, that you may live. 
   Then the LORD God Almighty will be with you, just as you say he is.  Amos 5 :14